So I know we haven't been posting much but what is there to say? We are both generally very happy in our relationships and not having issues and don't know what the hell you people want to know or whatever... Ohhhh and we started writing these epic blog posts about how our prom would be if we could go back and re-do it with our current boyfriends and who would be there and everything... but I have to be honest... that was insane. We got carried away and it was like planning a real prom minus calling and paying... We might keep working on that, we might not. Soo... I just have to say, I am a happy girl. Athila is a very very private person and it drives him insane that I am not. He won't admit that it drives him crazy, but I gave him permission to read my personal blog the other day for the first time since we met... his reaction? "WHYYY ARE YOU POSTING CONVERSATIONS!?" (ok not exactly, he is much more proper? when he says things... and its usually worded funny cuz he isn't a native english speaker...) anyways... I told him that I post the conversations that I want to have on hand in my blog because some days I need to read them. I need to know that he thinks I'm beautiful, I need those text messages that literally made me stop breathing and smile like an idiot, I need those trite lines that if I didn't know any better I would think he got from some cheesy romance novel. I need those things on hand right there when I need them. For example... Athila went all... missing? for a few weeks... By missing I mean he wasn't himself. He wore jeans and t-shirts, gym shorts, sandals, played video games, and was weirdly unaffectionate? This doesn't sound like it would be cause for eyebrow raising to most people (minus that last one) but to me it was. Something I loved about his attire was that he wasn't one to ever wear normal clothes. Normal for him is long sleeve button up collared shirts, "social pants" (slacks), the occasional tie, suit jacket, scarf... business man attire. Extremely sexy in my opinion... even though I've complained (jokingly) that he needs to loosen up and wear normal human clothes and stop being such a square. So anyways... Theres also the aversion I have to video game players. I haven't really talked about my ex boyfriend much, but he is a video game addict... so my heart kinda stopped when I heard the video game going while Athila was talking to me... It threw me off and I literally asked him "who are you and what did you do with my boyfriend!" Sooo he said he needed to balance the scales a little and be casual for a while to help his sanity. OH!!! I understand.. You're either an extreme business man, or you're an extreme boy? Why can't he just be normal and balance the two nicely? Happy medium! So after a few weeks of this and a few discussions about how I miss MY boyfriend and that he was an impostor and all this and we even decided that this impostor must be named (we may or may not be very strange people) it looks like he found balance. I now have my loving (more affectionate than prior to this mental breakdown) adoring suit and tie not so engrossed in his game boyfriend! But at the same time I believe he has found that balance between being his business man self and his every day guy self... I love it.
Wait, I got off track there... I post those convo clips and cute things he says to me because when he goes off on those little hiatus deals I miss the sweet loving things, and he doesn't say them much. I write my personal blog FOR ME. I don't mind that others read it, but I don't write it for others, I keep writing it FOR MYSELF. I might be in a horrible mood and need the conversations to make me feel that much better and he won't be online so I look to those to make me smile. If I had to search through the archives to get to them, I would be in an even worse mood. They are there for me.
Oh, mentioning his need for constant privacy, he still hadn't put a relationship status at all on facebook... so, after debating and an argument after he denied my relationship request on there (it wasnt a big deal if he would have just ignored it instead of denied it... cuz then at least it would show up on mine, which is what I wanted, I didn't care if it was on his or not.) and I tweaked the privacy settings on my facebook and found that he can actually accept the request, and hide his relationship status all together from everyone. So after some compromise and trust, he allowed me to accept the request, hide his status, and it may not seem like a big deal but the gesture that he allowed a compromise with me at all is a big deal to me. Baby steps.
This last month has been full of learning and growing. I taught him balance, he taught me confidence. I'll get into that another day. Until then, I'm headed back to the constant conversation going with him to add to the mental list of why this is totally worth it all... all 6,424 miles and unknown wait time.
What is something you learned to do early on in your relationship?
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